The Summer Garden

I have just read the third and final book in the Tatiana and Alexander trilogy by Paullina Simons - The Summer Garden.
At first I found it was just too full of sex if that is possible but after ploughing through the first 300 odd pages a plot started to form and after being encouraged to finish reading it, by my eldest daughter, I am pleased I did.
It was good to sort of finish the 'life' story of Tatiana and Alexander and the family. It was 838 pages so quite a mammoth read but a great sense of satisfaction completing it and the series.
These books cover their lives starting in Russia at the start of WW2 and the love that holds them together keeping them alive as they eventually arrive in America in times of peace.
The other two are...

Macaroni Cheese

I love pasta but unfortunately my husband isn't that keen so if he is away or there are enough left overs to make up a meal for him the rest of us have pasta. I would eat it all the time if I could but then I realised that the recipes I like don't have many 'greens' so one would have to have a lot of salad etc to get a balanced meal. However every now and again pasta is goooood!!

One my son loves is macaroni cheese and I have made it so often that I don't have it written down (like a lot of my recipes) as I have changed it over the years. And I don't really know the quantities so you have to guess.
This serves two people and the milk is really just a guess. If you know how to make white sauce you will know how to adjust it.

Macaroni elbows (about a cup)
20gr butter
half an onion
1 tblsp flour
a few slices  of ham or bacon
1 cup milk approx
1/4 tsp dry mustard
pinch of cayenne pepper
1 cup of grated cheese
breadcrumbs
tomato
Bring to the boil a large pot of salted water and add a few drops of cooking oil (this helps the pasta stop sticking together).Add pasta to boiling water and cook macaroni until just cooked.

Melt the butter in a microwave and oven proof dish you will cook the macaroni in.
Add the diced onion and cook for a couple of minutes.
Add chopped bacon/ham and cook for another two minutes.
Blend in flour and cook for about 30 seconds.
Slowly stir in milk a few tablespoons at a time. Once it is a creamy mix add rest of milk stirring well and then cook on high for about 3-4 minutes stirring every minute. Add more milk if it is too thick.
Add the seasoning and cook another minute until the mixture is a white sauce consistency.
Add 3/4 cup of grated cheese and stir in straight away so it melts.
Add drained pasta and mix through.
Flatten and top with the rest of the grated cheese and a handful of bread crumbs.
Place sliced tomatoes on the top.
Bake in the oven for 20 minutes at 180C or until the topping just starts to turn golden

Lastest Knitting

I love hand crafts like knitting, crocheting and sewing, however over the years the family have not really wanted much. But now there are grandchildren and I am able to knit little garments that don't take long and give me much pleasure. There is something special about finding a pattern and then the wool, knitting up the garment (and being small these can just take a week) and then finishing it off with buttons etc.
My latest was a little jacket for Evelyn our 5 week old granddaughter. I used some old wool I have had for ages and "Design Four" from the Cleckheaton no. 423 pattern book, "Little babies including Premature Sizes".

Mumseys' Apple Crumble

With the cooler nights coming in we seem to enjoy a warm pudding served with cream or vanilla ice cream.
One such recipe is one I have made for years and so it is made just off the top of my head.
My youngest daughter was helping with tea the other night and wanted to make it so I had to give her instructions as she went along and it is so easy to make...I thought I would blog it for the rest of the cherubs should they need it.

About 5 or 6 apples
50 grams butter
1/2 cup of flour
1/2 cup of soft brown sugar
1 cup of rolled oats (but you could use crushed weetbix)
1/2 tsp cinnamon

Cook the apples in the oven dish that you are going to make the pudding in if it is microwave safe. Cook in the mocrowave for about 6 minutes on high with a little water and covered. (Or you can stew them on the stove with more water, but drain most of the water off when placing in the pudding dish when they are done. You don't want a lot of water or the topping will get soggy.)
Melt the butter in a bowl or pot and add the other ingredients mixing well to combine.
Sprinkle over the apple and bake at 180C for about 20 minutes until the topping is lightly golden.

This is excellent for popping in the oven after a casserole or roast and good for using up old apples or ones that are a bit marked etc. We used some of the windfalls from our apple tree

Bryant Retreat for Women

A few years ago I had what was commonly seen as a breakdown. With out going into details here, I learnt that for me I have to look after myself and at times take time out.
With five children some of them married and with children of their own and a husband that suffers from a mental illness, some times 'time out' means going away on my own where all my needs are taken care of.
I have been on two over the last six months and the latest one was simply amazing.
I had to commit to 11 days as that is part of being able to totally relax. It was at the Bryan Retreat for Women, in Raglan and it was totally free, although you have to be referred there by your GP.
I arrived on a Monday afternoon and left 11 days later on the Friday morning.

 The brochure  states, "Bryant Retreat was created to provide an environment where women are able to rest in quiet, calm, surroundings. The simple timetable, together with the relaxing atmosphere and peaceful location of the home, provides guests with stress-free surroundings in which they are able to think out their problems....The timetable at the home allows plenty of free time so that guests can unwind, free from work, home and family responsibilities.... The Bryant Retreat is for women between the ages of 25 and 65 years, who are in need of rest and relaxation. A maximum of six women guests at a time are accommodated for ..."

The timetable was a bit alarming before I went but I realized it was so right once I was there.

• 7.30am  Breakfast in bed; Quiet time spent in bed until after morning tea. No shower or bath until after morning tea
• 9.30am Morning tea - served in bedroom. Guests arise and dress - free time until 12 noon
• 12 noon Dinner, Rest until 2.30pm
• 2.30pm Afternoon tea - served in rest area. Free time until 5.00pm
• 5.00pm Tea 
• 8.30pm approx. Supper - at time to suit guests
•  9.30 approx. Guests are asked to be in bed unless arrangements are made with Manager.

When It Seems to Much

There are times when the things going on around me seem just too much and I feel like it is just going to send me "down". The other day I could feel this start and then in my daily bible reading I get from The Word for The Day

It was titled 

Stop Worrying About It!

Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you - Psalm 55:22 NKJV

When worry comes knocking on your door, stop it on the doorstep or it will move in and take up residence. 'Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you' (1 Peter 5:7 NIV). God cares about the things that worry you and prey upon your thoughts. He cares about them more than you do. None escape His notice. Because 'you are his personal concern', He watches over you day and night. 

A worry = Anything that robs you of joy; anything you can't change; anything you're not responsible for; anything you're unable to control; anything that torments you; anything that keeps you awake when you should be asleep. All of that 'stuff' needs to be transferred from your worry list to your prayer list. The Bible says, 'Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God's peace...' (Philippians 4:6-7 NLT). Give each worry, one by one, to God. The more you practise doing this, the more exciting your walk with Him will become. You'll be amazed at how easily He handles things that overwhelm you. Remind yourself that He's able to handle it, willing to handle it, and waiting for you to give it to Him. 'Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you.' Those who live worry free are those who keep casting their burdens on the Lord until it becomes as natural to them as breathing! 

I know this. I have read this kind of thing, time and time again, but daily I have to remember to "cast" them upon Jesus because He cares for me.

And the blessing comes straight away as I feel the heaviness lift.

Mental Illness and the Ones You Love

Mental Illness (MI) is not something we tend to talk about a lot but when you live with someone with it, you want it to be 'out there' in the open. It is part of who that person is whether you like it or not and although we don't like to focus on it sometimes it rears its ugly face and you can not help but have it control and influence everything going on.

My husband had a Brain Haemorrhage (Aneurysm) in March 1984You can follow a time line of his illness's and the affect on me here. 

Notebook: Magazine

He has suffered from the MI of chronic depression with suicidal attempts. Last November he tried another overdose and is at the moment in a very low place again talking of doing it again. It is a real life situation that we as his family and those who love him, have to watch and live through as he receives the help he needs to come through.

Sometimes it is hard to separate the MI from the person who suffers it and you can become very confused and annoyed that they think the bad thoughts that they do, but when you can separate the illness as being "The Illness" you see the person you love and so want them to break through it.

The journey is hard and even more so when for myself as a wife and mother I have to support my husband and then all the family as they cope with it too.

This is when I so need to look after myself so that the illness I had (mentioned in the link above) does not bring me down as well.

It is my faith in God that carries me through for without Him I would fall and probably not even be here myself.

Praise God that He knows and will not give us more than we can handle.